Fat in Philly: Syrenka Luncheonette

A proper golumpki.
We called 'em holubky, the Slovak name, growing up.

This is without a doubt the worst time of the year. With the days still getting shorter, and a 30-degree forecast looking balmy, the light at the end of the tunnel is far too faint. If you're anything like me and loathe winter and all the restrictions it brings, you, too, will benefit from the comfort of minced meat wrapped in cabbage leaves covered in tomato sauce, potato-and-dough dumplings sauteed in butter and slathered with sour cream, and cakes of shredded potato, fried to crispy-edged perfection.

Should you be the brave one to enter the kitchen with the expectation of delivering some sort of joyous meal for your family members this holiday season, I'd recommend taking a cue from everyone's favorite up-and-coming Europeans, the Poles. It's a story told here through the eyes of the busty and beautiful mermaid Syrenka, who swam from Warsaw to Northeast Philadelphia with a desire to serve cafeteria-style, satisfying meals to working class East Coast a-holes some time ago.

Potato pierogis, a thing of beauty and butter.

Oh, when chilled applesauce meets
the steaming hot, chewy center of a potato pancake.

Syrenka Luncehonette is located in the Port Richmond section of Philly at 3173 Richmond Street. Everything's cheap. Cash only. 

Ahmad's Persian Cuisine

1009 Howard Street
Omaha, NE 68102
402.341.9616
Open Tues - Sunday, 11:30am - 2pm and 5:30pm - 10pm; closed Mon
ahmadscusine.com

Potato and Peas Poloe ($7.95 lunch/$14.95 dinner):
Poloe means "rice with stuff," from what I can gather. 

Don't freak out, people. The stretchy, soft flatbread served with the hummus here isn't pita. It's lavash, which is basically the national bread of Iran and the surrounding lands. You know, they sure do have some silly political leaders -- but boy, can they make some flatbread.

Mast-o-kyar ($5.95):
Yogurt and cucumber sauce with mint.
Use the lavash bread as a spoon. 

Lavash might remind you of tortilla. The mast-o-kyar -- which is Farsi for "yogurt and cucumber" -- might remind you of tzatziki sauce. And the dolmeh appetizer is probably a bit like other stuffed cabbage dishes you've had in the past. But everything had its own subtle twist, as if it is made according to one dude's recipe book that he keeps in his head.

Falafel Sandwich ($5.95 lunch):
Three falafel balls, each drizzled with tahini, eat it with your hands.
(That's a haiku.)

I thought it a bit odd that the open-faced falafel sandwich came with lettuce dressed in something similar to Thousand Island, and the discs of falafel were heavier than some, possibly due to the fava beans in the recipe. The potato and peas poloe only had two pieces of potato and looked a lot like the mixed vegetable poloe I had the week before. Still, all was yum. The spiciness came on in a strong, even wave, and I got the sense they go through a lot of lemons around these parts, judging from the bright citrus flavors in many of the dishes. Perfect for summer. 

This Old Market fixture has been here a while, truckin' along quietly on a busy corner, a few wooden tables on the patio usually staying occupied. The "WC" sign over the restroom and the size and ambiance remind me of any and every falafel joint in Berlin. At lunch, the waitress handles the whole restaurant like a superstar, and I imagine Ahmad in the kitchen, plating the food he loves to share, and maybe even painting those beautiful grill marks on the lavash, one by one. This place is off the chain. Kinda makes me feel like going on a trip to the Middle East. Oh wait, nevermind... 

Dolmeh ($6.95):
"Cabbage leaves stuffed with beef, vegetables, lentils
and topped with tomato based sauce, delicately seasoned." 

Mixed Vegetable Poloe ($7.95 lunch, $14.95 dinner),
in a lemon garlic sauce.