Happy Hour at the Michael's Cantina at the Market

1102 Harney Street
402.346.1205
Open Sun - Thurs 11a.m. - 11p.m., Fri and Sat 'til midnight
More importantly, happy hour weekdays 3 - 6p.m. (half off margaritas and appetizers)
michaelscantina.com/market.html

A close inspection of the sign will reveal the word "fine."

There's bad Mexican food, and then there's bad food. I hereby set aside all labels, specifications and standards. I'm throwing out my obsession with authenticity and qualms about the spice level in order to tell you, my dearest fellow diner, that the food here is not worth ingesting. The solitary exception is the South of the Border appetizer sampler, which features four of the usual suspect dips, executed with exquisite averageness, and never ending basketfuls of both corn and recently-fried flour tortilla chips. The point is merely -- and yet also imperatively -- to give you something to do with your mouth in between sips of the deliciously boozy beverages.

From the hours of 3 to 6p.m. on any given weekday, Michael's is the most magical place to get tipsy with friends and coworkers alike. You'll likely have the place to yourselves, which is an added bonus. Jump start your hangover with one of our nation's favorite drinks, the high fructose bomb that packs a powerful punch: the Margarita.

Rocks with salt (Reg $5):
For those of us who haven't yet outgrown the concept of "these will get you wasted."

South of the Border Combination Platter (Reg $9.99):
Colorful, and oh so edible

This concoction is known as the Tamale Float,
and it, along with the hot wings, jalapeño poppers, and taco al pastor,
has about as much culinary appeal as a satchel of silica gel. 

Trini's

1020 Howard Street
402.346.8400
Open Tues - Sat, lunch from 11:30am and dinner from 4pm
$1.99 Margs on Tues and Thurs, Happy Hour 4-6 Fri and Sat
trinisoldmarket.com

Enchilada de Jocoque (single lunch serving, $6.50):
Chicken in a sour cream sauce with monterey jack cheese,
and a side of "refritos" and rice.

Whether or not you choose to like Trini's shouldn't depend on its mainstream location, or the claim by fans that it's "pretty authentic." I would bus to the end of the Earth (West O) for Trini's, if I happened to be in the mood for supremely honk-ified Mexican-ish cuisine. There's nothing unique about this place, except maybe for the fact that it shares a wall with one of the most expensive restaurants in town. Despite this -- can I just sound like an upper middle class homemaker for a moment? -- the bathrooms, located a hallway and some stairs outside of the restaurant, were atrocious. On the other hand, if you're wandering around the Old Market and want to do something illegal, this is the bathroom for you.

One blackened tilapia fish taco in a deep-fried "puffy" taco shell ($6.95):
In case you're wondering, yes, I felt puffy afterwards.

The Spread

There was something nostalgic about the food in that this is the Mexican I ate as a child. I couldn't quite tell if the chips were made in-house, or whether the mild cilantro salsa was doctored up from out of a jar, but who cares. On the fish taco, the "house chipotle sauce" seeped into the "puffy" taco shell nicely, but didn't offer much of a chipotle flavor. Luckily, the "specially prepared greens" kept things light (kidding). I was impressed by the simple black beans and white rice, which they managed to turn into a rich, buttery treat. Ditto for the Enchilada de Jocoque and the accompanying refried beans. I imagined Julia Child's ghost in the kitchen, whispering, "If you're afraid of butter, use creeeeeeeeeam."

Trini's is great for indulging on standard Midwestmex, especially if you're looking for a nice, secluded restroom where TP isn't necessary.

Soft shell beef taco ($3.35):
Get your Taco Bell without all the late night drive thru hullabaloo.
(I'm looking at you, 38th and Dodge.)

Jacobo's Grocery

4621 South 24th Street
Omaha, NE 68107
(402) 733-9009
Open Tues thru Fri 8:30am-6:30pm, Sat and Sun 8am-6pm, Mon closed
NO PHONE ORDERS, CASH ONLY
www.jacobos.com

You ain't seen no chicharrón like this one. It's like, a whole side of pig.
Burritos and tamales, too! 

I am typing this to you with one hand, and sensually shoveling a forkful of tamale into my mouth with the other. Next time I visit Jacobo's, I won't hesitate to tear open the corn husk in the parking lot and just start eating it there. Pretty soon I bet my car will be full of empty corn husks, which is better than Taco Bell wrappers, for sure. The lightly fried beef burrito was good too, but I think I'd prefer all or nothing as far as deep fried goes. At $1.50 each, someone should inform the cars wrapping around the nearby McDonald's drive-thru, cause these burritos are a much more fulfilling fat lunch. Shelves are stocked with every type of bean and rice you can imagine, along with a hot sauce for practically every day of the year. Behind the counter, a lard ball* floats in the vat of pinto beans, proof these are "real deal" frijoles. The chips and salsa might be some of the best in the city -- but you have to like cilantro. In sum, Jacobo's offers a cheap, fun lunch, and on some days you might burn enough calories standing in line to justify stuffing yourself.

*A later conversation with Mr. Jacobo revealed that they do not use lard in their beans. I must have been hallucinating. Nothing new there. 

Menu

Pastry Case

At Home

Shang Hai Garden

3118 South 24th Street (in the shopping center just north of Vinton)
(402) 342-2244

A Chipotle, a Tomatillo, and a Tomato Salsa,
Paired with Corn Chip Strips

Shrimp Egg Rolls--
More like big spring rolls, with sweet and sour sauce

I dipped my egg roll into the spicy tomatillo salsa. Just because I could.

This isn't fusion, this is a fight: Chinese vs. Mexican, happening now, in a South O strip mall next to No Frills. Tablecloths with Chinese characters. Wall posters exclusively in Spanish. Kikkoman, Sriracha, AND Tapatio on the tables. To be clear, if I wanted either one of these cuisines on its own, I wouldn't come here, but there's something about the wacky combo you should experience at least once. Sure, the tables were sticky, and I preferred not to think about the grime that must be living in the kitchen. Just sweep the dirt under the carpet in your mind and you'll be fine. The highlights were the salsa trio, house-made and hotter than Helen's house, and the shrimp egg roll, which was ready to take any unlikely dip you could throw at it. The meat in the tacos had a hint of Chinese spice, like what would happen if you stored your al Pastor with your Kung Pao in the same tupperware for a few days, and the tortillas were no bueno. Our entree, Snow Pea Chicken, was so-so, but a few heaping spoonfuls of delicious chili sauce made things more interesting.

I can't vouch for Shang Hai in terms of culinary mastery, but it is a novel idea carried out by folks who aren't aware of their "concept;" they're just eatin' what they like to eat.

Pork Tacos

Snow Pea Chicken

Chili Sauce

Restaurant y Pupuseria salvadoreña

1702 Vinton Street

Omaha, NE 68108

(402) 502-2528

Open Monday thru Saturday 9am to 9pm, Sunday 10am to 9pm

One Fried Pork, One Cheese and Bean, and One Cheese and Loroco Flower, with Curtido--
Which is which? It's kind of a surprise.

Ok. I'm pretty excited about pupusas, thanks to this newer gem of a place on ye olde Vinton Street, right next to Louie M's. These are a Salvadoran thing, somewhat comparable to a Mexican gordita. It's like taco meets crepe meets polenta cake. It's like melted cheese and beans, and loroco flower. (Loroco what? It's kinda reminiscent of okra or artichoke hearts. Just try it.) It's like legit watery tomato salsa that is almost too hot for white people to be eating. Don't forget curtido, the lightly fermented cabbage slaw with red chiles and vinegar. The "fried pork" pupusa goes like this: Stringy white melted cheese, fried pork ground to nearly a paste, and something in there that makes the whole thing taste like a chile relleno. Wa-bam. 

The lime green interior of the restaurant doesn't really scream "appetite," but the madre y hijo working there are warm and welcoming, and the place is so sparkling and bright it's almost got that new restaurant smell. At a DOLLAR FIFTY per giant pupusa, there's really no excuse not to give it a try. 

What the Inside Looks Like

Chips!

Tacos el Peligro

5133 S. 25th St. (Just north of 25th and Q)

Omaha, NE 68107

Open 'til 10 most nights, and I hear 'til 4am on weekends (!)

Homemade Chips with Salsa Fresca, and Chipotle and Green Avocado Salsas with Fresh Limes and Radishes

After the "trying out a new Mexican place" disaster a few weeks ago, we hoped Danger Tacos wouldn't be as dangerous of a choice. We knew as soon as the chips were promptly and politely placed in front of us that we were in the right place. The green avocado salsa is absolutely amazing, with a nice spice that keeps your mouth slightly burning throughout the whole meal. No canned stuff here. Notice the pineapple on the al pastor taco; isn't that how it's supposed to be? Where lots of other places skimp, Tacos Peligro comes through. My chicken sope had tons of juicy tomatoes, even with the price of this fruit at an all-time high. I can't really say enough about how pleased I was with the whole experience, and it's worth noting that I did not feel like a fat pig afterwards. So brush up on your Spanish--the staff will appreciate it--and head on in. 

BTW, here's a handy South O restaurant map.

Taco al Pastor

Dos Tacos Carne Asada

Sope con Pollo

El Dorado

5134 South 24th Street (just north of Q)
Omaha, NE 68107
(402) 734-4947
Open lunch and dinner everyday
www.eldoradomex.com

Chips and Salsa

Pork Tostada and Carne Asada Taco

Carne Asada Quesadilla with Rice and Beans

It all started with the chips. Store bought and heat-lamped with boring El Pato-based salsa. Feeling a little overwhelmed by the large menu of seafood and other concoctions, we ordered our fav stand-by items. Maybe that's where we went wrong. The pork tostada wins the prize for Greasiest I've Had So Far. The little pellets of carne asada in my taco resembled poop. It's been hours and the quesadilla is still chillin' in my stomach--evidence that the ingredients were not fresh. The beans were ok but not enough to get me to go back, ever.

Fish Fork

Fish Knife

The piscine-inspired cutlery won't even do the trick. Some other reviewers say the seafood is good, but since here in Omaha we couldn't be farther from an ocean, I think I'll stay away. They're serving poop beef in our country's great steak mecca, for Christ's sake.

Romeo's Mexican Food and Pizza

2929 Farnam Street, Omaha, plus four other locations
(402) 346-1110
Mon-Thur 11 to 9,  Fri & Sat 11-10, Sunday Closed
www.romeosomaha.com

Romeo's in the Reader. Romeo's in the theater program. Romeo's on TV! That was it, we had to cave and try this local chain with near-viral advertising. We clipped our $5 off coupon and headed in. Just before noon and the place was already packed with people on their lunch breaks, adding to the cheerful din. Booth was comfy and rather dimly lit; service was prompt. Romeo's boasts both Mexican fare and pizza, so we tried both, but what was this? No complimentary chips? Fine, be that way. We ordered "chips and cheese" ($4.79) to start, and were served a very non-spicy bowl of cheese product, along with a basket of packaged chips that had been under the heat lamp all morning. One soft chicken taco, one pork and bean tostada, and one beef and bean "Sancho" later, we were full of some of the most bland and flavorless fat snacks ever experienced: Floppy tortillas, shiny cheese, wilted lettuce, the whole unsavory package. The pizza was better than Pizza Hut but worse than everything else if you know what I mean. In the sit-down version of Taco Bell, we paid our $28 dollar bill and left, knowing we would laugh about this someday. With everything shamelessly store bought on the cheap, the owner of Romeo's must be laughing, too, all the way to the bank.

Chips and Cheese Dip

Beef and Bean Sancho with Guacamole and Red "Chili"

"Soft" Chicken Taco (with Fried Flour Tortilla) and Pork and Bean Tostada with Sour Cream

Mini Pepperoni Pizza - 8"

Taqueria el Rey de Omaha

5201 South 24th Street (24th and Q)
Omaha, NE 68107
(402) 502-0674 
They have a drive-thru and a delivery car, though I'm not sure how far they'll deliver. If you want the abbreviated version try their taco truck in the Avanza parking lot at 31st and Leavenworth.
Open later, and til 2am on weekends (!)
www.taqueriaelreydeomaha.com

Chips and Dips

Three dips for your homemade chips: (watery) beans, a'spicy salsa, and tomatillo avocado. The ramekin caddy is downright classy, as are the flat screen TVs showing the Latina Judge Judy at a respectable volume, and the wrap-around windows offering a panoramic view of 24th and Q. It's obvious this taqueria "chain" (three locations if you count the truck down the street and the newly-opened restaurant in Lincoln) is doing well for itself. They were a little stingy on the tomatoes and cheese on my sope with carnitas (a savory corn cake with pulled pork, essentially), but that's ok. I dumped on the rest of the chip dips to take care of the slight dryness. At $2.25 per sope, you can't complain. As for the tacos, the double corn tortillas aren't anything special, but the ultra-fresh cilantro, scallions, and white onions are. The al Pastor meat was well marinated and perfectly greasy. The carne asada burrito--filled with layers of rice, beans, cheese and steak--came cut in half, probably because it's actually two meals. The flour tortilla was basic but satisfying. Here is proof that Mexican food in Omaha can be pretty damn good.

Mexican Coke

Carne Asada Burrito

Al Pastor Taco

Sope with Carnitas